May I have this dance?

Right now I feel like the ground underneath me is shaky, moving up and down and side to side. Not a lot feels very firm and secure in my life right now. So much is coming and going...kids growing up and leaving home, selling my house after being here for 13 years (the longest I've lived in one place by far!), my place in life, income, career, relationships, emotions and hormones! My world doesn't quite feel upside down although it could.

Even when you are in a bad place for long enough (in my case a bad marriage) it becomes familiar and in a weird sense "stable". At least you think you know what you've got no matter how bad it is. You sort of know what to expect. The routine is the same and so is the dance...as dysfunctional as it is. Mine had become the dance of the zombie, the music was morbid and the moves way out of step. Nonetheless it was predictable. Was I fulfilled and healthy...no!

In reality my life was way more topsy-turvey and less secure than it is right now - it just took me a while to realize it. The life I live now is far more healthy and fulfilling but in someways harder too. Sooner or later you have to acknowledge that it's not what's going on in life that completes you but rather your walk (or dance) with God.

As I have pondered Psalm 16 lately God assures me that He is the one who assigns my "portion and my cup". Sometimes that cup is a bitter one and hard to swallow. Jesus asked for His to be taken away. Yet He trusted God, His Father, and was committed to doing what He wanted so He drank it. Psalm 16 went on to say that He "makes my lot secure" and places "boundary lines around me in pleasant places". I have a delightful future ahead of me...in part here but culminating in heaven with Jesus. I have seen enough of life to know full well that life here is guaranteed not to be what I expect but far better. This will be virtually impossible to see at times of that I am sure. However He will be there to guide me every step of a dance I'm not very good at yet.

It doesn't matter how unstable life seems He remains the same...as steady as a rock. I will not be shaken for He is with me. That's a lot to get excited about! I can relax in that/in Him. I know for sure that the One who was willing to die for me will certainly not abandon me leaving me to be tossed about by the quakes or tsunamis of life.

God has shown me a new dance - so different, so alive, so beautiful. This one brings deep joy, excitement and assurance. It goes on forever gaining more and more momentum and grace...culminating perfectly in heaven. Perhaps you're still doing the old, miserable yet familiar dance. It takes guts to get out there and join Him on His dance floor. Questions flood our minds...Do I trust Him to lead me? Can I keep in step? Will I trip and look stupid or hurt myself? or Will I look into His face and forget what's around me?

He stands before you asking "May I have this dance?


Psalm 16
1 Keep me safe, O God, for in you I take refuge.
2 I said to the LORD, "You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing."
3 As for the saints who are in the land, they are the glorious ones in whom is all my delight.
4 The sorrows of those will increase who run after other gods. I will not pour out their libations of blood 
or take up their names on my lips.
5 LORD, you have assigned me my portion and my cup; you have made my lot secure.
6 The boundary lines have fallen for me in pleasant places; surely I have a delightful inheritance.
7 I will praise the LORD, who counsels me; even at night my heart instructs me.
8 I have set the LORD always before me. Because he is at my right hand, I will not be shaken.
9 Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body also will rest secure,
10 because you will not abandon me to the grave, nor will you let your Holy One see decay.
11 You have made known to me the path of life; you will fill me with joy in your presence, with eternal pleasures at your right hand.

Psalm 62:5-7
Find rest, O my soul, in God alone; my hope comes from him. He alone is my rock and my salvation; he is my fortress, I will not be shaken. My salvation and my honor depend on God; he is my mighty rock, my refuge.